Life is a balance of light and dark:
When things are dark, they are not always dark, there is always still light.
When things are light, they are never 100% perfect, there is always some darkness.
- Serafina dumped my new bottle of lemon stevia, a carton of juice, and a carton of almond milk AND peed on the floor twice all within the past 6 hours. My mop sure got a workout today.
- Serafina also spilled a thing of Cereal all over the living room floor and still crumbles up many of the foods she is given.
- The side walks are still snow-covered and so we are stuck inside and can’t go out for walks as a family. Serafina also doesn’t keep mitts on and it is too cold for her to go out when she won’t dress properly (or at all).
- I miss time with Autumn and Kesa alone reading in my bed and being able to actually do things together without having to jump up and check on Serafina or worry about her and autism in the back of my mind constantly. I hate asking for help from the girls too, it makes me feel guilty.
- I’ve been feeling emotional these days, a little up and down, but not as down as I had been, thanks to yoga, a more cleaned up diet and getting back to spiritual study and practicing gratitude and mindfulness.
- The sun has not shone in a few days and it has been dark and gloomy. 😦
- I miss family meals, but am seeing that maybe it just isn’t a reality any more for most households and accepting that.
- Cleaning and cleaning and cleaning to no purpose. Sweeping a hundred times a day and endless amounts of dishes and laundry.
- The attitude of a certain someone with red hair. Annoyance at the fact that she is often imitating me. <— That can drive you crazy! It also teaches that lesson of seeing ourselves reflected back at us through others and to be mindful of our thoughts, words, and actions.
- The imitation and idealization of a certain someone with strawberry-blonde hair for the certain somebody with red hair who has that attitude sometimes.
- Using pull-ups and seeing so many go into the landfill.
- Feeling overwhelmed at times as a stay-at-home mom with little time to reflect on the good and beautiful any more.
- Feeling a general sadness and loneliness over the fact that it seems that so many people do not care about our world, thought energy and vibrations, and the need for light and love we are meant to bring.
- No time to write.
- No time to sit and relax.
- Endings. Saying good-bye to the old.
- I have been able to do yoga in the morning again and go out for walks by myself and listen to Rudolf Steiner. This helps me to clear my head and focus on what I want for our life together.
- Autumn is doing very well in piano lessons and has such a love for music these days.
- We have found some time here and there to read, like in the van and when Craig is around to watch Serafina. We are currently reading Jo’s Boys, the fourth book in the Little Women series.
- Serafina has been mostly happy the past few days, keeping her clothes on more often and going to bed early every night.
- I sent a surprise in the mail to a friend yesterday and felt good doing this nice deed. 🙂
- We are all well-fed and enjoying the food that we have, even if we are having different things to eat. We do all still sit together at the table, even if we are eating different things.
- I have been trying to buy organic more often again and cut out the girls consumption of sugar, even if it is organic.
- I cleaned up my room and it has stayed that way for the past 12 hours.
- Wanting to try cloth training pants for Serafina.
- Got 3 loads of laundry done.
- I always make sure that dishes are washed, even if they are sitting in the dish rack waiting to be put away.
- I have an awesome, loving and patient husband who is also SUCH a great daddy. Massages are appreciated.
- Learning what matters to me from life’s challenges. I wouldn’t trade any part of my life for something different and love every bit of it, challenges and all.
- Jason Mraz music. Danicing with my smiling babe.
- Gratitude for the people who care and who strive to undergo personal transformation to see our world become a better and brighter place for all beings.
- A 9-hour sleep last night! (Though I am still tired.)
- New beginnings and new opportunities. Saying hello to the new. A chance to transform myself again with new strength to manifest a bright future and inspire others through my life’s example.
- Real friends who care and take the time to connect, even though we’ve never met in person. You touch my heart! I love and appreciate you! ❤
There is always darkness, but there is also always light. Nothing is ever completely black and white. Life is a balance of light and dark and we really do need both.
Hope that this has inspired someone else to find their positive perspective.
I cleaned up my room and it has stayed that way for the past 12 hours << haha that's a good one ❤ love your honesty and gratitude ❤
Usually Serafina destroys every room (she is always on the go) and Autumn and Kesa spend a lot of time in my room too. It is where we paint and read. ❤
Loved to read this post. I have been overwhelmed with a lot of things past few days so this post is a good inspiration. My plate seems to be overflowing all the time.
Lately, I am trying to accept the fact that I am sensitive too. I have been running away from it for all these years. There have been a lot of feelings/thoughts put away in the closet. I am wondering if I actually need to take them out or leave them there.
Glad that it inspired you Ritu! It is hard to know what is best. I think it is good to acknowledge them, but not keep them front and center as our focus. If you do not acknowledge them, you cannot heal; yet if you dwell too much on them, then they also rule your life. There is a time for everything. Writing out the light and dark in this way is helpful to keep a positive perspective. 🙂
I agree, there is always light and dark in our lives, the hard part is seeing the light through the dark, and you my friend have done just that. It is the practice of seeing the light that reminds us just how blessed we are.
Love this post!
I think it’s so good you’re baking again and back to the healthy-organic-cutting refined sugar way you use to be😊
I’m sure you’ll see Serafine will make a huge change…. She’s very very young and looks like she’s got terrible tantrums which is still very normal for that age (we’re not all the same 😉) I got three childre two of them had terrible two and the other terrible three (until four)
Some speek sooner and others later, some are pretty aware of outside life and others for the inside, some have a lot of imagination which is creative and others don’t. I really think we are all different and not canned food which is wonderful … So probably Serafina just needs a bit more time to adjust but will grow and behave better, you’ll see 😊
The point in how seeing and feeling we can choose to be positive or negative and that affects everything… I think you’re being more positive 😊
Thank you for the wonderful blog which is very inspiring 💐