You

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I wonder about you. What is it like to think your thoughts? What is it like to feel your feelings? What is it like to be in your body and your mind?

I find myself caught in a spiral of empathy, intimidation, and fear over you. I feel bad for you. I want to help you. I want to understand you. I know you know so much, yet sometimes I wonder how much you know. I believe that just because you cannot speak, doesn’t mean that those who can are any better or smarter than you. I don’t know what else you understand that I can’t, but we know you can see through us. You feel things deeply.

You are sweet and smart and anyone who meets you loves you instantly. You are content and happy but when you get upset the whole block just might know about it.

You are stubborn and strong-willed. I think you get that from both mommy and daddy. 😉

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You are gentle with your brother and other people. You are curious about them and their faces. Your eyes catch theirs for a moment, any more might be too much.

You are silly sometimes. Lately you like to be huddled up in your blanket and hide away. Not because you are scared but because you like the feeling. You like to be sneaky and will quickly run out from hiding to grab something, like my phone or some food that you want to eat.

You are a beautiful soul with a warm energy. You are curious about everything around you. You love to smell different smells off of people when they come over. Perfume, shampoo, laundry smells, they interest you.

You like to be alone at night in your room and laugh. You love to play with different toys that you get obsessed with. A treasure box, sock monkey and magna doodle board are some of your favorites these days.

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You are a sensory-seeker and for fun dumped two different shakers of salt this week, as well as shredded your blanket into little bits. That is your kind of exploring.

You are growing and changing. Soon you will be six! My baby girl has grown so much.

Life would never be the same without you, exactly as you are. As tough and confusing as life with your autism can be sometimes, we would never trade any bit of it for anything.

You are a free spirit that can hardly be tamed, but if people had the heart to open up to you and see you as you are, they could learn a thing or two from you.

 

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