Judgment

Thank you all for your beautiful and encouraging comments regarding last night’s post! Blogging is sometimes a difficult thing because I do often have this fear of being judged and struggle with letting myself be fully myself and real. I often hold back in my writings and don’t say what I fully want to out of fear of being judged, but I think I have good reason to feel this way because I have been judged by others (including my family members) in the past when I was being fully me. It has happened on more than one occasion that someone has said something to me and I really don’t take their words lightly. I actually like to examine within myself whether their words are true and have a look deep within myself to determine whether or not I do need to change something about my life (as I was reflecting last night).  I am a deeply reflective person and I really do desire to do good.

I think that this lesson came into my life to teach me something that I have been internally struggling with for what seems like forever. That is, to not be so afraid of what others think or say about me and to just let myself be real and not hold back. This is something that I really struggle with in life. I know that fear does not serve me, but still, it is terrifying so to let it go, especially when I have been judged. I think that the ultimate lesson for me in this is to let go of others judgments as well and to not let their judgments of me and my life affect me. To know that if someone is judging someone else it is (as many of you said) really a judgment on themselves and reflecting something about themselves back to them. The same is true of when we judge another person, we are only judging ourselves or avoiding looking deeply within ourselves to face some sort of inner darkness.

I obviously spent a great deal of thought on this yesterday because the person who I had a discussion with was close to me and I was honestly able to come to a good place about it. In searching my heart, I really do not feel as though I am being boastful in my life or on my blog either. In my heart, I know that the way that I am living my life is right for me and my family because on this path I feel nothing but complete peace. I know that being vegan is what is right for us. I know that homeschooling is what is right for us. I know that my spiritual views are right for me and I know that writing this blog and keeping it public is right for me. All of these things are right for my life right now, but that is not to say that at another moment in time things will change.

There were other words spoken in the conversation which also hurt and came from a judgmental place. I thank you for affirming to me that another person’s judgements speak more about them than they do of who they are judging. Ironically, I also came across this video last night which was a great message to me and a great reminder. I thought that I would share it with you all too! Such a beautiful message!

It is also a good reminder to think before we judge others and recognize why we are making judgments on others.

Thank you again! Thank you for choosing to be apart of my life and being my friends. You are all lovely! 🙂

tiffany6

9 thoughts on “Judgment

  1. It is only natural to feel hurt when a trusted person’s words sting, but I am glad you reflected upon this event, and decided to continue sharing your loving, helpful message despite the hurt. Years ago when I was blogging, a friend of mine said ‘I’m a very private person. I would never want to blog like you do. Don’t you think it’s a violation of your family’s privacy?’ OUCH! For days, I asked myself if I was over-sharing. It hurt! Eventually, the feelings subsided and I could look at what she said objectively. Indeed, she was very reserved and revealed very little about herself and her family. This, even though we were friends for over a decade. If I was honest with myself, her behavior frustrated me and, in many ways, I felt she was unknowable. We eventually drifted apart for these differences, and others.

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  2. I was thinking about you last night and thinking about how a negative comment can affect us. I received an email yesterday which was very judgmental. I saw through the email and knew that the author was trying to manipulate me but still … it didn’t feel good. And that got me thinking about why one negative comment has the ability to negate all the positive comments we receive. I think that we give too much power to negative comments … we allow them to ruin our days and make us doubt ourselves. I’m going to work on that because I didn’t like how it made me feel!

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  3. You are so brave! To keep a positive attitude through a criticism…I find it very inspiring. I just purchased your book and I am also a home school stay at home mom. Sometimes I feel people criticise things they don’t fully understand…it must be their way of dealing/ coping.
    Just know that those of us who follow you, love you and like what you are doing or we wouldn’t be here!

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  4. I do not find your blog to be “boastful” at all! I really relate to so many of your posts, especially the deeper ones about being sensitive, fear of judgement, etc. I am that way too, and I don’t know of many people who are that way (at least, in “real life”, people don’t seem to understand a person who is shy, sensitive, and hates being judged for making choices that aren’t the status quo). We chose to homeschool many years ago (when my oldest was 5, and she is almost 20 now!), have a large family, raised our children as vegetarians (and now vegan)….it has not been an easy road to take. There is a lot of judgement, hurtful comments, lack of support, and so on. I have questioned myself many times, and still do. I understand what you are saying about always re-evaluating your life and trying to do the best you can do. In the end, we can only do what we feel works for our own life and our family situation. We can’t please everyone. I think it is just human nature to compare ourselves to others, and sometimes people are not so quiet about their opinions. Live and Let Live would be nice if everyone could follow it:)

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  5. You are perfect the way you are and the hell with what anyone else thinks. I didn’t read the previous posting (yet) but I know that you being you is the most important thing you (or any of us) can do.

    Everyone makes judgments in life but we must be careful with what we say. I know words can be bullets to our hearts and I know how much it can hurt but it’s part of what makes us more of who we are and that can be a good thing if we can harness the power once we have a grip on what’s going on.

    Please keep sharing your life here in this peaceful, beautiful and inspiring way that you have. You are a wonderful woman who is very appreciated. Thank you for being you and sharing so much with us here.

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