Wondering

Sometimes I take a look around at my wonderful life and wonder what I did to deserve it. How did things come to be the way that they are? Is it Karma? Good choices?  I wonder how it is that I wound up where I am, doing what I am doing and loving my life. I can say right now that I am truly content with the way things are in my life and I wouldn’t change a thing if I had the chance to.

I have the most caring, supportive and understanding husband who has seen and loves my innermost self and has always supported me to live from my heart and let the rest go. We connect on every level and can be ourselves in front of each other without masks. It is a beyond amazing relationship that we have, even though we are 24 years apart in age and everyone thought that we were crazy and stupid to be together. We are perfect for each other in every way.

I have three amazing, smart, funny and beautiful little girls who I love to pieces and who I get to have home with me to share every day with. They are my world and I am not sure what I would ever do without them, although I know that day will someday come (sooner than I wish).

I get to stay home and work at doing what I love, coming up with healthy vegan recipes for my family and sharing them with others. We can afford to buy healthy food and feed our family nutritiously on one income.

I live in an old-style house in the country and get to enjoy long walks in nature everyday. We are just 10 minutes away from the beach and get to go there to cool down often. I love living in the country. I am not at all a city/dress-up/fancy kind of girl.

I am physically healthy and am able to enjoy exercising my body daily.

I have connected with and befriended many beautiful people through this blog of mine who have touched my life in a deep way. Women who use my recipes to feed their families on a regular basis. People who I have inspired and who inspire me too. When I first started this blog, I didn’t think that anyone was really out there, so I am grateful for everyone who is and whose life has crossed paths in mine. You mean so much to me.

I guess what is heavy on my heart right now is the fact that so many things in the world these days seem so bad and imperfect and it truly saddens me. There are so many unhappy people using quick fixes to fill their emptiness. There is so much death, hate, suffering, sadness and emptiness, that it makes me feel selfish for having it so good. I wish that people could be happy and live a life that satisfies them. I wish that people could hear the voice of their innermost self and follow their heart, without paying any mind to what they think they should do logically or what people might think of them if they did (the mind too often gets in the way). I wish that people weren’t so wrapped up in their egos and afraid to let them go.

My life was/is not always easy, but I strive to keep my head up. I believe in making the most of every situation and try my best to not stay down for too long. I have created many positive and healthy habits in my life to keep my mood up and harmony in our household. I try to keep a grateful heart and focus on the beauty in everyone and everything and count my blessings.

And mostly I believe. I just believe that as dark and sad as everything seems at times, it is all working out for greater good. Surrendering certainly seems to me to be the biggest factor in living a life that I love. By not having to worry so much about everything, it seems to all get taken care of.

Tonight we got to watch the fireworks they had in town from our window. It was another beautiful memory. Serafina loved them and wasn’t afraid. Last year when they had them, she was in my belly hiccuping away. Hard to believe how fast time flies.

Enjoy your weekend! 🙂

3 thoughts on “Wondering

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